Chronicles of a University + Nursing Student - Post #1

So this week marks my 4th week as an official university/nursing student and I have to say, 

it's, on so many levels, wayyy different than high school.

At the current moment, the biggest emotion I'm currently feeling is:

OVERWHELMED.

Don't get me wrong, I love my program and the content I'm learning (that's not the issue - I genuinely know I made a good decision going into nursing), it's just the QUANTITY of the content!!! The amount of readings we get each day almost makes me want to projectile vomit and just thinking about it gives me goosebumps.

Despite the homework overload, I don't think I'm as far behind as some of my peers (I know people that are still on week 1 - YIKES). I think that for the most part, I'm up to date with my most important courses and just for future reference, I'm going to list the courses I need to catch up on:

- Anatomy & Physiology (Oh, Lord..)

- Psychology (Puke)

- Nutrition (..is a joke)

..See?! Not too shabby! Only 3/7 courses and I'm not even THAT behind.. (she says with doubt..) 

If I'm being completely honest though, I'm actually very scared. What if I don't get the marks I need to get? What if Anatomy and Physiology (double puke) pull me back? What if I never get caught up on readings?

Now for any of you reading this (*cricket, cricket*), you might be wondering, "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU WASTING YOUR TIME WRITING THIS BLOG POST WHEN YOU SHOULD BE DOING YOUR READINGS?!" 

Well, let me tell you something.

A big reason why I'm so far behind is because every time I open up my books and my Macbook to do my readings and make some notes, I have this huge, overwhelming feeling looming over me that's hindering me from actually completing the task. I feel like I need to let it all out before I actually crack down, you know?

Anyways, my main goals for this 4th week (already?!) is to get caught up on those 3 courses I mentioned above and to finish my Psych study notes.. and my Nutrition assignments.. and my Psych paper (eventually).. OH, SWEET JESUS MURPHY.

Pray for me, y'all.

Toodles.

Sty xo

Things I Want To Say

When I say you mean everything to me, I mean you mean everything to me.

I literally feel like you know me better than my own family knows me and there are times where the only person in the entire world that is capable of putting the slightest hint of a smile on my face is you.

You're the best thing that has ever happened to me.

If you never walked in to my life, I know 100% that I would not be the person that I am today.

The person I am today is a person that I am proud of.. on most days. 

Nevertheless, you've literally pushed me and motivated me beyond so many limits these past 4 years.

You're the love of my life.

I know that no matter what, you are and always will be the love that I cherish the most.

I've never loved as hard and as fiercely as I love you.

You're the one.

I can't even begin to conceptualize anybody else by my side for the rest of my life.

It's always you.. It's always you.

There's literally nobody else out there that captures my heart or even my attention as much as you do and I have no desire in finding out if there's anybody else that comes even remotely close to you.

I already know that there's nobody else.

I know that I'll always be in love with you.

Always. 

Always and forever - that will never change for me.

I would literally go through bullshit after bullshit for you.

There's nothing I wouldn't do for you. 

As cheesy as it sounds but I'm fucking dead serious when I say if you were at gun point, I wouldn't have to think twice to take that bullet for you.

Caring for you and making you happy gives me the best feeling in the entire world.

When I see you happy, especially if I'm the reason why, I'm literally instantly overjoyed - it's a feeling I would never trade for anything in the entire world.

I wish you loved me as much as I love you.

I just want to be enough for you - because you're more than enough for me.

You're much more than I deserve.

I just want to be your only one.

I wish you'd realize that nobody can love you as unconditionally as I can.

I pray one day that you'll realize how much I truly love you.

Every time I say my prayers, I always say you last because even with God, I like to save the best for last.

When I pray, it's mostly about you - about us.

You make me incredibly happy.

You're irreplaceable.

You're my first love - I want you to be my last.

I wish things were back to the way they were.

I miss you.

I miss us.

I love you.