The People I Get Along With The Least: My Mother & My Second Youngest Sibling

I don't know if it's just me but I live in a household with two very aggressive, hard-headed, tyrannic women.  

That may sound bad all the time but it's not that bad all the time.

Most of the time, it is.

Let's start with my mother.

She was born and raised her whole life in the Philippines, a whole other culture and she was a law student, aspiring to become a lawyer in the Philippines.  Right before she gave birth to me, she was just about to take her bar exam (which I have no doubt in my mind that she would have passed) but she decided not to go through with it because, well.. I was baking in her oven. 

(Not literally)

Anyways, my mother has always been a very strong woman, which is pretty much an understatement for the kind of person she is.  She asserts herself in whatever way she can, she LOVES to exercise control over anything and anyone and she definitely has NO problem speaking her mind.  In this aspect, I fully and totally admire her for the woman that she is.  She's incredibly hardworking like you wouldn't believe and I actually think she's an undercover super hero sometimes (full-time business woman, full-time mother to 3 kids, full-time wife, full-time everything). 

I completely love and respect my mother with every bone and cell in my body, trust me, but she is the most infuriating person in the entire planet sometimes (don't I just sound like a teenager? Heh).  She's completely tyrannic because she has the SHORTEST (and when I say short, I mean MINUSCULE) temper I've ever experience in any individual my entire life.  She's a very passionate woman so when she gets angry - she gets REALLY angry. 

She says a lot of things that she doesn't mean and are completely unreasonable, she does things very drastically and dramatically just to unleash her anger.. Overall, she's the worst person to be around when she's not in a good mood.  I just wish that she were able to control her anger more and stop taking things so seriously and so heavily and just start... you know, being more light-hearted and slow-tempered.  Her temper and her inability to control her temper (despite the fact that she seems to be a master at control everything and everyone else) is really starting to take a toll on our relationship and I really don't want that with my mom.  When she's in a good mood, we have tons of fun together and she's super fun to be around.  She's funny, she's easy-going, she's such a good vibe to be around... when she's in a good mood.  Otherwise, she's a complete (excuse me, Jesus) bitch. 

Segue over to my second-youngest sister now.

My second-youngest sister is a year and 8 months younger than me so we're basically twins (we look very much alike, same height and everything) and we do everything together.  Unfortunately... You know how they say there's a good twin and there's a bad twin?  

She's most definitely the bad twin.

From the moment we were babies, she was the one who threw a tantrum every 2 seconds, who screamed her head off all night long for no reason, who refused to be put down and left alone, who threw things at people and hit people whenever they approach them.

Little has changed since then.  

While I inherited my dad's calm, easy-going, slow-tempered, semi-careless mindset... she inherited my mom's mindset.  

It can be really difficult living with ONE tyrant, imagine with living with two?!  It drives me insane sometimes.  I'm not saying I'm perfect (those two are MUCH better than me at many, many, many things) but what I like about myself is that I am very good at controlling my anger and I have a very slow-temper.  I don't come off as intimidating or scary, I'm more relaxed and happy-go-lucky.

A lot of the times, I feel like those two team up and gang up on me whenever I say something that they disagree with.  Whenever they say something that I disagree with, I usually just keep my comments to myself and listen to whatever they're saying to avoid an argument but they really have no trouble starting one.

The crazy, hypocritical thing is that once the argument starts - they blame it on me!

I think that because those two are just so OBSESSED with control and being right all the time, they can't handle being wrong at sometimes and can never admit when they do wrong.  It's disheartening because they're such good people and they're strong attitude and quick temper get way ahead of them.

I cherish the times when neither of us are screaming at each other or giving each other attitude because it could literally be only a few seconds and then BAM - we're all screaming again.

I feel like myself and my poor dad are just basically the doormats they walk on a lot of the times and maybe we take for granted what my mom does, I know I should really express more appreciation for what she does because she really deserves it, but I think that it should be a two-way streak as well.

I'm just praying that our family dynamics will strengthen and we'll just grow stronger together as a unit because these lunatics mean the most to me in the whole world.

Regardless of all of this, I still love them and they're my rock.

Can't choose family, right?

Lol.

Cheers,

Sty xo

MY Thoughts On An "OPEN RELATIONSHIP"

Up until recently, I never fully considered an "open relationship." Actually, I always thought of it as a stupid concept and a pathetic label for someone who has commitment issues. To be honest, I still feel the same way but up until recently, I've seen this concept in a new light.

An open relationship, from MY understanding, is being in "casual" relationships with multiple people. It basically means that while you may be seeing one person, you are in no way monogamous to that one person and you have other people you are calling/texting/kissing/having sex with/calling 'baby'/etc.

My boyfriend & I have been going through a lot of issues lately, mostly dealing with the fact that our 4 year relationship has kind of hit a plateau - basically, we're in a rut. We both agreed that there was something lacking in our relationship lately and we weren't on the same page anymore - we both were at a point where we realized that we had different goals for our relationship.

So after tons of talking (and tears), we decided that we needed to really figure out what we wanted for ourselves individually and what we wanted for each other and together as a couple. He decided that he would like to try seeing other people, seeing as I'm the only girl he's ever had a relationship with BUT he also wants to work on our relationship TOGETHER. I decided that I would also TRY to see other people while we work on our relationship as well, although I would prefer to stay monogamous. Basically, we decided on trying out this "experiment" but making the focus of this "experiment" about us - working on US and rebuilding our relationship; creating a stronger foundation for us as a couple and as best friends.

That's the most important thing to both of us while we try out this relationship - the fact that we work on us.

In short, here are the basic terms & conditions of our "experiment":

1.) We stay together; we're not breaking up.

2.) For the duration of frosh week (the "party week" before we start university), we will also try to CASUALLY see other people (ie: a little flirting, a little kissing, a little dancing, etc).

3.) We hold off on any physical intimacy (for the most part) in our relationship until we're at the point where we're both on the same page again.

4.) We focus on the "best friend" part of our relationship and try to connect on a deeper level.

5.) He tries out new experiences and gains more knowledge about relationships and other girls so he's not so naive about that whole scene.  

6.) I try not to think so much about the past or the future and try focus on living in the moment and taking our relationship day by day.

7.) We both set up goals for each other as a couple and we work hard to achieve these goals day by day together.

The only thing that's grinding my gears is the "seeing other people" part... I just wish that he wouldn't need/want to see other people, you know? He says that he just wants to try it and see how it goes, just for some experience and I guess for "fun" purposes but I do kind of feel like he wants/needs to do this because I'm depriving him of important life experiences. In a way, I do know that I am depriving him of the experience of being with other girls because I'm his first and only but I just wish I was enough for him. It's lowkey killing me that I'm not enough but I take comfort knowing he needs me in his life and he would also like to put more focus on US and OUR relationship. It's still really comforting and reassuring knowing that he still loves me very much, he doesn't want me out of his life and he wants to focus on us more than anything in this experiment. If I love him as much as I say I do, I'll let him try to see other girls and gain new experiences.

I even asked him that if me and any other girl he would be "seeing" or hooking up with at the time were to get into a cat fight, which side he would take and he said,

"YOURS, OBVIOUSLY!" 

Haha. Bitches.

Regardless of what encounters we may have with other people within the next few weeks, we both know and agree that we're both more important than any sideline hoe or sideline.. man, lol. 

We're also starting a new and really big chapter in both of our lives - university. We started and ended high school together and we both decided that since technically, we'll be entering "the real world" in a few short weeks, we should begin a new, more mature stage in our relationship. I can't let him enter this more mature stage of our relationship without letting him experience other things as well first.

I just hope that we don't lose sight of what's most important during this experiment - each other.

We'll see how this goes!

Cheers to a more mature and stronger relationship built on a stronger foundation.

Anyways, bye.

Sty xo   

In a moment of unbearable boredom (ah, my exciting Friday night) - MY WEDDING DRESS IDEAS

Nobody panic.

I'm only 18 - WELL, OFFICIALLY 18 TOMORROW ON APRIL 20TH, 2013. 

(WOO!!!)

Therefore, I am not getting married for a very long time.

With that said, I AM EXTREMELY bored at the moment as I spend my TOO EXCITING Friday night before my birthday at home, watching wedding shows on TLC.

(Anybody else obsessed with wedding shows, ie: Say Yes to the Dress, I Found the Gown, Four Weddings, etc.?)

Now anyone who knows me really, really well knows my obsession with weddings.

I told The Boyf, who so kindly did NOT freak out, that I am indeed obsessed with weddings and if I were not pursuing a career in nursing, I would probably pursue a career as a wedding planner or wedding dress stylist.

With that being said, after watching about 1 000 000 & 1 wedding shows for awhile now, I've developed a PRETTY good idea about what my future wedding dress will look like.

THE DRESS

I'm not that big on DESIGNERS, I only really know a few; namely, the most well known ones (ie: Wang, Pnina, Lazaro, Paloma, Sottero, A. Angelo).  To me, as long as it fits well and looks really good and I absolutely love it, it'll do just fine.

I do see myself as being the traditional bride.  This means something white/oyster/pearl/ivory, something a-line with a slight poof OR a ballgown.  Strapless. Sweetheart.  Roushing (sp? I never got how to spell that word properly).  Touch of bling.  Classic but with a little.. PIZAZ.  Ya feels me?

Now - the budget.  I really don't believe that you should be spending more than maybe $3500 - $5000 on your wedding dress.  If budget permits by that time, I would probably cap my budget at $5000 max (and if possible, that includes alterations and the veil).

 

Alfred Angelo: http://www.sophiesgownshoppe.com/alfred-angelo/80ww2w65w

What caught my eye with this one is the sparkles on the bottom and the roushing (sp? LOL IDK W/E).  I am a big fan of sparkles but not TOO much of it and I know that the whole bottom is decked out in sparkles but in my opinion, it's so small and gives the right amount of shine; tastefully done.  I also love that the roushing is done right on the waist area, really gives the illusion of an even tinier waist.

Maggie Sottero: http://www.sophiesgownshoppe.com/maggie-sottero/80ww2w25ww3

I absolutely LOVE the top of this dress! The bead work is impeccably done and I love the detail along the waist! Also the chiffon-type bottom makes it extra cute - chiffon means it's lightweight, comfortable and easy to walk down the aisle/dance with! 

Paloma Blanca: http://www.sophiesgownshoppe.com/paloma-blanca/80ww2w69w

I really do love roushing, my future wedding dress most DEFINITELY has to have roushing in it.  It makes you look so much thinner and it just make the dress hug your body in all the right places.  #WerkIt.

*Pnina Tornai: http://www.pninatornai.co.il/eng/video1.aspx?pid=1629

Ughhhh, I LOVE LOVE LOVE this one!!! The detail along the waist, the detail along the neckline, the corset bodice, the layered bottom - LOVVVE! Well obviously, who doesn't love Pnina?  Here's to my dreams of hopefully one day being able to afford one.  Cheers!

Despite any expectations I may have of my future wedding dress, I do know that my expectations will change throughout the years and who knows?  By the time it does come around to my wedding, I may want a fit & flare, mermaid!  

Like I said, as long as it fits well, looks good and I absolutely love it - I'll be a happy cookie bride! 

To any brides or bride-to-be's out there: GOOD LUCK AND HAPPY HUNTING! Have a fabulous dress, a fabulous wedding and a fabulous marriage! 

Cheers.

Sty xo

  

REVIEW: Essence Stay With Me Longlasting Lip Gloss

I've only just recently started to really get into make-up.

I'm in the "building" stages of my current make-up collection but I have been watching many Youtube Gurus educated me on what's good, what's not, what's new, etc., etc.

I've found something new myself.

It's a drugstore brand and although I'm not ENTIRELY sure if they're ONLY sold in Canada or not (I've really only seen them in Shoppers Drugmart - a drugstore that's only available in Canada), they're very readily available to us Canadians here anyway and VERY, VERY inexpensive. 

(Most of their products are under $5!!!) 

I've only bought their lip glosses so far and they are probably the best lip glosses I have ever used.

Here are the 3 that I do have:

 Deep Rose (Dark, mauvy-pink)

 My Favorite Milkshake (Peachy, pink-nude)

Me & My Icecream (Baby pink)

 Some swatches:

 The names just make it SO much more adorable, LOVE the names.

 Top swatch: Deep Rose

Middle swatch: My Favorite Milkshake

Bottom swatch: Me & My Icecream

Pros of this product:

• VERY pigmented - true to colour
• The applicator makes it easier to put it on your lips
• Not sticky at all
• Has a nice taste (almost vanilla-y)
• Smooth consistency
• VERY, VERY inexpensive (THEY WERE ONLY $2.99 EACH!!!)
• Very natural on your lips
• Great on any skin tone 

Cons of this product:

• Not very long-lasting at all (you'll have to re-apply throughout the day)
• Not a large colour range (only 4 colours - the only colour I don't have is a dark, red, vampy sort of colour)
• Hard to find (like I said, I've only really seen it in one drugstore here in Canada [Shoppers Drugmart] and I'm not entirely sure if they're available in other countries)

I don't really have an issue with re-applying the lip gloss, it really is no trouble at all and these colours are what is suited best for my skin tone anyway so really, on a personal level, I find this product almost perfect for me.  For someone who is JUST starting on make-up, it's really hard for me to find GOOD quality, affordable make-up (since I'm starting, I really don't want to splurge on anything yet) and these lip-glosses have just done the trick for me.

I wear them almost every day since they're really good every day neutrals.  To anybody that can get their hands on them, I HIGHLY recommend them, they're really great! 

Toodles.

Sty xo

Snow Day! + Beyonce Appreciation Post

Now I live in Canada, Southern Ontario (the Greater Toronto Area region) and right now, we are said to be experiencing the heaviest snow storm we have ever experienced in years.

25cm-50cm of snow!

Hence, NO SCHOOL! WOOHOO!

What a good day for a snow day considering how badly neglected my Math homework and Kinesiology homework was last night. 

Yay for 3-day weekends.

Anyway, on this day of being snowed in, I've done pretty much nothing else but watch fashion videos and watched countless videos of this fierce goddess right here:

Photo link: http://www.gq.com/women/photos/201301/beyonce-cover-story-photos-gq-february-2013#slide=1

I have been a HUGE Bey fan from Destiny's Child, I'm A Survivor days to just a few days ago when she ROCKED the Superbowl 2013 half-time show.  There are just 1 too many reasons on why I really love this woman.

I'm not really a die-hard/hardcore B fan but I am a BIG, BIG fan and I'm super bummed out that I can't see her perform here at the ACC this summer. *Tear.

To be quite frank, nothing says, "FEMALE EMPOWERMENT" like Beyonce.  She has truly taught women of all ages all around the world to embrace womanhood and be confident in our own skin; I see her as the spokesperson for all of us "fierce women" out there (WHICH WE ALL ARE).

She's just amazing.  She's an amazing performer, a loving wife, a beautiful mother and just an all-around GREAT person, you know? 

Now I recently watched an old Ellen DeGeneres interview with Beyonce and they talked about her I Am Sasha Fierce album and about her "other persona." 

Beyonce said that yes, while she enjoys her upbest/up-tempo, "va-va-voom" music (ie; Diva, Single Ladies, Ego, Who Run The World, etc.), she really just enjoys singing her more vulnerable, emotional, honest ballads even more (ie; 1+1, Halo, If I Were A Boy, Smash Into You, etc.).

She said that these types of songs were a more HONEST interpretation of who she really is as BEYONCE and it's more true to her character which I personally think is just BEAUUUUUUTIFUL.

You go, Bey!

Despite her amounting success, she continues to remain so humble and so down-to-earth.  She's just so REAL and so..... HUMAN (which is very hard to say in many celebrities in Hollywood).  

I think it all comes down to her genuinely GOOD music, her humbling/down-to-earth personality and her ability to stay FIERCE without being "in your face" about it is why I truly love this woman.

Beyonce gets 11/10 stars in my book. 

Anyway.............. it's still snowing QUITE heavily outside and my dad & grandpa are trying to shovel their way out of the snow but really, I don't see any point in shovelling right now when the snow is just coming down harder than ever.

Oh, Canada. Our home and native land.

I'm probably going to spend my day off doing homework, working out, eating, cooking, watching fashion videos, reading fashion blogs, watching movies, talking to my guy, what have you.

Have a good one.

Sty xo

DEANDRI'S INSTAGRAM GIVEAWAY (My first time EVER winning any contest EVER!!!)

ACKKK!!!

I'm in a current state of shock, happiness, bliss and absolutely everything good in life.. and I have been for the past 24 hours!!!

Why is that, you may ask?

Well..

As a proper shoe fanatic and fashion enthusiast, I am well obsessed with everything from Jeffrey Campbell to studded denim to Doc Martens to collar details.. THE LIST IS ENDLESS! 

My current fashion obsession for about a month? 

ONE WORD: DEANDRIS.

For those of you who don't know, Deandri is an amazing clothing which a girl called Deanna Richmond has started (22 y/o & from LA).  Deandri sells everything from clothing to jewellery and (probably the most exciting part for me) HANDMADE SHOES!

Yes, HANDMADE shoes, my darlings!!!

Now Deandri (www.deandri.com) also has an Instagram (@deandri) and on their IG, they hosted a giveaway where 2 winners win... (dun dun dun) A FREE PAIR OF FREAKING SHOES!!!

And among the two - ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

I WON I WON I WON!!!

Now you can imagine my sheer and absolute delight - as a person who has never (EVER EVER) won ANYTHING in ANY contest her entire life & who's brain functions as 50% fashion, 50% everything else - when I found out I won!

I have literally been busting my BUTT posting submission after submission after submission (after submission.. after sub-- you get it) on MY Instagram (@ohmystysty) trying, hoping, praying that I win and to my fortune, I did. 

So this post serves to do a few things:

- Gush and gush and gush about my first time winning any contest ever

- Expressing my everlasting gratitude to Deandri for allowing me a free pair of BEAUTIFUL (AND OH MAN, DO I MEAN BEAUTIFUL) pair of shoes which I have been proper obsessed with what seems like forEVER

- Promote such an amazing, one-of-a-kind, handmade, BEAUTIFUL brand and try to convince you lot to pick up a pair yourself

I hope you were okay with me expressing the magnitude of my happiness at the moment. 

When I receive the shoes that I chose, I will make a proper post about it, pictures and all! Who knows? I might even make a SHOE UNBOXING VIDEO? ;) 

Ciao!

Sty xo

Disclaimer: Deandri did not ask me to promote them in any way possible, I am not getting paid by them.  I am merely promoting them solely on my own, they have not asked me to do so.  Other than the free pair of shoes I won on their Instagram Giveaway Contest, I am not receiving anything from them whatsoever by promoting them in this post.